Miserable Misadventures in Ur

We need a blog to keep track of what in the heck is going on. This is that blog.

Chapters

  • Introduction
    In which our heroes meet each other at the Dojo of Grimble Grumble; There is an emu chase; There is a short trip to the Underdark, where we met The Vegetable Man (a.k.a “Veggie”); A chicken is kidnapped. A chicken is rescued; Something about ducks.

  • Chapter One: Baron Saturday
    In which our heroes travel to the Isle of Craptopia; a warning from a Goblin; there is a fight with a shadow and several brooms; Items are liberated from the town; A bunch of dead Goblins; A journey to the Estate of Baron Saturday; Blank and Arthur are met; Our party is joined by new companions; A gallery of paintings; A vexing door; Another brief trip to the Underdark; The Baron’s Office is opened; Clues are discovered; The Baron saves the Island; A brief Journey to another dimension; A telescope and three celestial objects; A disagreement about a Telescope; Madness; Flight.

  • Chapter Two: Ink
    In which our heroes find themselves on a ship; Meeting a new companion; Veggie nudges them to an Island; An Egg; The Bay of Cliché; A most troublesome Goblin (in a tabard adored with a Duck); A creepy feeling; “LEROY JENKINS!”; A barroom brawl; Merrow and Hags; Black Ooze and Earth Golems; A long hall with a lot of lava and small gravity problem; Ziggurats are never good news; Ink.

  • Chapter Three: (Decisions Need to Be Made)
    In which our heroes have not experienced anything yet.

Dramatis personæ

  • Arthur
  • Blank
  • Cole
  • Grimble
  • Muffins
  • Skirfy

A Not-So-Brief History of Ur
The ‘patalogical Sorcerers and How They Blew Up the Planet
The evolving story of Pataphor, Syzygy, Clineman, Antimony, and Absolute; their Generals, before and after the war; Towers, and what is left of them; ‘patalogical artifacts and hard lessons about touching them; and Ubu.

A Travel Guide to Ur
Maps, turnips, and how to get around from where you are now to where you will most certainty meet a painful and humiliating death. Good times.

The Pantheon of the Multi-Verse
Or, how to find the right god to spend your eternity with. Death is inevitable, so who do you want to spend it with?

Oh, and there are the Elders, too.

Other Important Facts
Including, but not limited to: “Nothing with a pseudopod is friendly, Ziggurats are never good news, never trust a man with an elaborately stylized beard, and how turnips saved the planet.”