I am Dorothea Greskkovi\u010dja, Historian of Boudi\u010dja\u2019s Forge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
These are my notes on the life of Absolute, Sorcerer, which I have prepared for her Ladyship of the Forge, great maybe her vault.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We know, perhaps, the most about Absolute. All of this is attributable to the fact that both his generals survive today and neither will shut up for want of breath.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
These generals, if that is what one might call them, are The Man Who Invented Himself and The Man With The Lightbulb Head. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Here is a digest of what I endured to learn:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Born in Arcas, Absolute was raised in a small tree house at the edge of Swampadelia. He was formally educated, such as formal education was at the time, and his parents had aspirations of his rising to some level of prominence among the town-based marsh dwellers of the southern continent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Arcas was dominated by Katyl Bilebiter, who more or less tolerated some levels of civilization, since it made hunting dinner and plundering wealth somewhat easier if it was all organized as tribute (read, sacrifice) or at very least in one fixed location.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Absolute and his followers abandoned all notions of civilization. Instead, Absolute painted \u201cFurther\u201d on an elephant who agreed to carry his band of mirthful rascals on his back; and, together they wandered around Arcas, noodling around with magic at it’s source, and steeping a hell of a lot tea from toadstools \u2014 and failing that, boiling down cane toads by the dozens into an hallucinogenic syrup.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This congealed into the \u2018patalogical foundation of Absolute’s slippery epistemology.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That is, the pataphysics of Absolute was rooted in the transcendence of the material reality itself. Absolute was beyond beyond. He was \u201cway out there.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He was known to have coined the dubious \u2018patalogical axiom, \u201cI am, therefore. I think.\u201d
(He also coined the phrase \u201cDon\u2019t boggart the cane toad.\u201d)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was said of Absolute in the latter days leading up to The Cataclysm that Absolute was present when he was absent and absent when he ws present. The best way to know when Absolute was inout\/outin was to listen for the sitar music. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Katyl Bilebiter, having become increasingly aware of Absolute\u2019s growing power decided far too late to get about the business of dissolving Absolute into puddle of protoplasmic goo.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When Katyl finally encountered The Sorcorer, Absolute ruled the whole affair as “uncool” and \u201charshing his buzz.\u201d Absolute dismissed Katyl with a banishment spell of some sort. He said, \u201cLook after your leathers. Your leathers are you. It is not cool to have shitty clothes; for shitty clothes is a shitty mind, and I shall not have it!\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Katyl become, in that instant, non-Katyl and Arcas became a whole lot more groovier.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Neither The Man Who Invented Himself nor The Man With The Lightbulb Head know what became of Absolute during the cataclysm. When asked how he died, they replied in unison: <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh, no, no, no\u2026 he\u2019s outside looking in.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I am Dorothea Greskkovi\u010dja, Historian of Boudi\u010dja\u2019s Forge. These are my notes on the life of Absolute, Sorcerer, which I have prepared for her Ladyship of the Forge, great maybe her vault. We know, perhaps, the most about Absolute. All … Continue reading